There’s no better way to measure a persons level of influence than by the number of weddings he gets invited to each summer. If being invited to multiple summer weddings doesn’t scream awesomeness, I don’t know what does. The first question I usually ask people is, “So, how many weddings are you going to this summer?” I then proceed to judge them accordingly. It’s only fair. Last summer we attended zero weddings. This summer we might attend five. Things are definitely looking up.

All kidding aside, I love a good wedding. There are few occasions I enjoy more than being part of a bunch of happy people celebrating two even happier people, toasting in their honor and doing things on the dance floor we would never do otherwise. Weddings are the best and craziest of times. When else can you openly ask the groom if he needs any last minute sex advice while prancing around in a tuxedo, carrying a bottle of champagne in each hand, his wife’s garter now stretched around the circumference of your head? I would guess not too many other times.

The best decision Quinn & I ever made together was to begin the process of exploring the possibility of marriage and moving forward with our decision to do so. Trust me when I say there was a lot of prayer involved! And, let me emphasize that beginning the process of getting married is just that, a process! Not a snap decision. Here are some questions to help you know if you’ve started the process:

1) Besides your girlfriend/boyfriend, who else have you talked to about marriage?

This is a no brainer. Decisions made without the input of trusted friends, advisers, mentors or family are usually, well, bad decisions. Ask the people who know you best to truthfully weigh in on your decision.

2) Whose advice are you seeking?

This is closely tied with #1, but I want to re-emphasize. Seek wise counsel! Marriage is not an ego-boost. It’s not a journey to be taken by one’s self for one’s self. Marriage is a collaboration. And not just a collaboration between husband and wife, but between husband, wife and community. That’s why people get married in front of witnesses. We’re all in it together. At least I think that’s why. Sounds good, regardless.

And lastly, here’s the one question I always ask men before they say “I do” and push that expensive piece of compressed Carbon onto their bride’s finger.

Does she support your passion, and do you support hers?

This may seem like a basic question, but I ask it because it has been so important in my own marriage. As a husband, the last thing I would ever choose to do is destroy or steer away from my wife’s dreams. And I know that she would never choose to steer away from mine. We all have passions and God-given desires in this life, and, at the end of the day you’re either married to someone who is for you, or you’re married to someone who is against you. If your future spouse isn’t supportive of your heart’s passions, then that person probably isn’t someone you should be dating, let alone marrying.

I always say that the worst person I can be for my wife is a man who has no fire, no internal drive, no dream to chase after. The last person any great spouse should want to be married to is one who has surrendered to mundanity. Anyone who pushes another to give up their dreams, especially in the context of marriage, is simply missing the point.

Cheers.

Quinn and I created this piece in collaboration with The ArtSpace and IndyMetro Church for the upcoming HARMONY Show opening this Friday as part of IDADA’s First Friday.  Our piece, along with 80 others from artists around the community, will hang to form the word HARMONY!

HARMONY has its grand opening this Friday, March 4th from 6pm-9pm.

For your invitation

Another beautiful Christmas and early winter shared with family and friends has come and gone. From building a snowman in Indiana to snowboarding in 18″ of fresh powder in North Carolina, this winter has been filled with joy and memorable moments spent with loved ones.

Clifty Falls State Park

Running the Indianapolis Monumental Marathon was absolutely the most difficult thing I have ever done.  I expected to be challenged by the grueling 26.2 miles, but I had no idea that it was going to be so physically and mentally demanding.  Never in my life have I attempted or completed so exhausting a feat, and, after 14 long weeks of training and 1 crazy Saturday, I have never been happier to have a goal completed and behind me.  Thank you for all of your well wishes and support throughout the past 3 months.  Thank you to my wife, Quinn, for being a great running partner.  She is the strongest runner I know, and she proved it throughout her race.  It was pure joy training with her over the past 3 months, and I look forward to future races with her by my side.  Here are some photos to share our day with you!

A map stating the start of the race.  Trying to figure out how to get from here to…

…here.  The finish line.

Packet pick-up at the convention center.

Running bibs…

Quinn’s running bib…

My running bib…

Plenty of fuel for the road.  I would recommend Power Bar gels, just not the chocolate.  Consistency was way too thick.

Pre-race jitters…literally jitters due to the briskness of the morning!

More pre-race jittering.  Lost some of our layers as we get warm and get ready.

Last minute strategy session.

Visualizing the finish.

Somewhere between 9 and 10 miles.  This is on 38th street before heading north to Broadripple.

We’re pretty happy at this point.  Water break.

Quinn losing some layers.  It got up into the 70′s! about 35 degrees warmer than what we had trained at.

Michael jumped in and ran a quick 6 miles with us.  Great help.  Nice to have someone new to talk to!

Another water break.  Still happy.

Quinn with her parents after finishing her race.  She finished 8th in her age division!

Getting ready to cross the finish line.  Turn off of West Street was the last.  So close!  Quinn’s mom and her dog helped me get there!

Quinn and I closing it out.  I was in pain.  Dehydrated and cramping since mile 18.  Ouch!

Hand in hand, crossing the finish line.

Attempting to stave off the shivers and stay warm!  The foil looks weird, but they actually work.

Quinn’s parents, Diddles the dog, and us. Indiana state capitol in the background.  Trying to re-hydrate!

Dr. Steven Airey, Quinn, Michael Ladd, and I.

Our good friend Ryan Sawrie, who also completed the marathon, with us and family.  His wife, Katie, (not pictured) completed the 1/2.  They rock!

The day after, Quinn in her Marathon gear and medal.

Bling…runners style.

The day after, fully re-hydrated and feeling great again.  I owe a big thanks to the St. Francis Hospital & Health Center staff for providing me with 2 free liters of saline solution right after the race.  They cured my dehydration with a nice IV and some great service.  I know a lot of us were extremely grateful to have them there!